Ray St. Louis
10/1/05
BETWEEN THE LINES
“All right guys, stick with me; this is hit and run film making here. Were going to get in and get out before
anyone knows what’s going on.
“Okay, let’s move in on those party animals over by the main bar. Stick with me, guys. Get that camera
and those lights over here. All right, are we ready to start taping? We are? Okay, here goes.
“HEY, HEY, HEY! We’re here on location at a happening Washington D.C. hotspot. Let me tell you, you
won’t see footage like this anywhere else. We’re UNCUT, UNCENSORED, and TOTALLY OUT OF
CONTROL!
“That’s right, people, it’s REPUBLICANS GONE WILD!
“Let me tell you, these guys are baring all. They’re all a bit lit up and they’re throwing caution to the
wind. Hey, Republicans, pull up your shirts and SHOW US YOUR DIRTY LAUNDRY!"
"WHOOEE...YEAH...YAHOO!"
“All right, time for some one-on-one. You there, sir…”
“YEAH, PARTEEE!”
“What’s your name, sir?”
“BILL FRIST, YEAH!’
“All right, the Senate Majority Leader! Bill, you’re being investigated by the Securities and Exchange
Commission for insider trading. Tried to pull a Martha Stewart there, didn’t you Bill?”
“YEAH BABY!”
“Well, I suppose you know you’ve probably screwed up your chances of running for president. You’ve
been a bad boy, haven’t you, Bill?”
“YEAH! I’M FEELING KIND OF CRAZY!”
“Yes you are. You’re a crazy one all right. HEY BILL, SHOW US YOUR ETHICS!”
“YEAH BABY!”
“It’s REPUBLICANS GONE WILD! Sir, what’s your name?”
“Tom…Tom Delay.”
“All right, the House Majority Leader. Tom, you’re under indictment for conspiracy to violate campaign
finance laws. You’ve been laundering corporate cash like there’s no tomorrow.”
“Hey, everybody does it.”
“But no one does it as well as you. HEY TOM, SHOW US YOUR ETHICS! SHAKE IT IN THE CAMERA,
TOM!”
“Okay, but it’s not wrong if everybody does it, you know.”
“It’s REPUBLICANS GONE WILD! All right, we’ve got several others to get in here. You two, state your
names.”
“Karl Rove.”
“Scooter Libby.”
All right, Karl and Scooter. You two super-patriots are under investigation for outing an undercover CIA
agent because her husband helped expose your lies about Saddam’s WMD’s. Talk about nasty boys.
Hey, Karl and Scooter, SHOW US YOUR HYPOCRISY!”
“September 11 made us do it.”
“Of course it did. Well look here. From FEMA, it’s Michael “Heckuva job” Brown. Hey, Brownie, SHOW
US YOUR INCOMPETENCE!”
“Not my fault.”
“And over here, a couple of lesser known but still wild Republicans: David Saravian from the Office of
Management and Budget, recently arrested for obstruction of justice, plus indicted lobbyist and friend of
Tom Delay, Jack Abramoff. Hey David and Jack, SHOW US YOUR CORRUPT UNDERBELLIES!”
“PARTY ON!”
“And there’s more. Here’s lobbyist and former FEMA director, Joe Allbaugh; he’s got a pocket full of no-
bid contracts that he’s just giving away. And look who just walked in the door – It’s William “abort black
babies to control crime” Bennett. I tell you these Republicans are totally out of control. We've got
investigations, indictments, incompetence and no-bid contracts flying all over the place. It’s a veritable
orgy of illegality and cronyism. And we’ve got it all on tape!
“It’s REPUBLICAN’S GONE WILD!
“And it can be yours for just $9.99. Call this number now: 1-800-GOP-WILD.
“Hurry while supplies last. (Sorry, not available in stores).”